"Existential Dread (And Other Dreams)" by Justin Kaminuma

February 16, 2019

My name is Justin Kaminuma and I'm currently an 18 year old college student based in Atlanta. For the past 5 years, I've been uploading short films / music videos to my YouTube channel with the hope that I can share a little about who I am with random strangers on the Internet.

In my first semester of college this past fall, I found myself feeling lonelier than I expected. That feeling hit hardest towards the end when I got extremely sick and had to isolate myself from everyone around me. I remember laying in my bed and hearing the sounds of people talking, walking, and laughing outside the thin walls of my dorm room. And in those lonely moments, my mind would drift into a half-sleep where I'd see pictures and think thoughts and feel feelings. Eventually, they'd lead into these dark confusing moments of existential dread.

This short film titled Existential Dread (And Other Dreams) is an amalgamation of all of this, which I decided to start making after reading a YouTube comment on a video for Aphex Twin's "Avril 14th." It started as a series of random moments that I've filmed over the past year, but slowly found its way through editing as a visual representation of just how scary and messy yet poetic and beautiful those moments were for me. I combined a bunch of different forms of media including 35mm film stills, 4K footage from my GH4, and my mom's old Sony Camcorder from 2001. The gorgeous music is by Johnny Goth.

I hope you enjoy it!

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